The Creepie Crawlies of Life

I tweeted last week about Boo's first encounter with a snake. It was surprising to hear my typically-fearless little one "scream like a girl" (as Hubs would say) and see him stand sobbing, paralyzed in fear after he saw a snake in our yard.

In all fairness, I can't blame him. I encountered one of our l-a-r-g-e native lizard-eaters in our garage a couple years ago. That thing was nearly as big around as my wrist and a good 5 feet long--maybe more. I screamed at him, he hissed back at me and for months I used extreme caution any time I needed to go into the garage.

Judging from Boo's reaction, I fully expected that encounter to keep him from playing outside for--maybe--ever. I also figured he'd want nothing to do with snakes either.

But this weekend we went to a birthday party at a nature center and guess who wanted to touch the snake the guide was showing to the kids?! Not Bug.

Talking later with my friend Lorry, she made the point that she tells her classes that when it comes to 'bad' things like smoking or doing drugs, it isn't some big scary guy with gnarled, yellow teeth and bad breath who will entice them to start a health-killing, ugly habit. On the contrary, it's going to be someone they like. Someone they trust. Someone they want to impress.

Isn't that the way it is with sin in general? It isn't the scary unknown that sucks us in; it's our 'friend.' A loved one. Someone we want to impress. When someone lovely holds the temptation, it's easy to give in. We override our own innate sense of caution to partcipate.

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After God set Eve and the Serpent at odds, He gave us the inborn sense to flee when we encounter slithery things. But we can become de-sensitized to that natural response by continually creeping closer and closer to the very thing that once repelled us.

This is why I believe it is so important to make a standard, set a boundary and do everything you can to give that boundary a wide berth. It's not always easy. It is more fun to flirt with the edge.

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I'm not going to bother to spell out those temptations. They differ for each of us and if I name one or two, it's easy to dismiss the point with a "well, that's not an issue for me." But we all have our weaknesses.

Your creepie crawlie could be a big serpent. The kind that trips you up when you encounter it. It might be just a little caterpillar, slowly chewing away at your resolve to live the life you desire--the life God desires for you.

My prayer for each of us is that we nurture that desire to flee the things that God has told us will bring us harm--no matter who is holding it.

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"Keep watching and praying that you may not enter into temptation; the spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak." Matthew 26:41

Ruby Tuesdays--Supportive is as Supportive Does

Welcome to Ruby Tuesdays. Join me and others every Tuesday as we blog something related to Proverbs 31. My theory is this passage is included in the Bible to inspire and uplift, not discourage us; to portray the endless possibilities of a woman's life, not to confine us to prescribed roles. I have far to go to become all He's created me to be, but I hope you'll join me as I blog about the journey.

"She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life." Proverbs 31:12

When I was growing up, the complaint I most heard from my parents was how selfish I was. It got to the point where I felt like 'selfish' was my middle name. You know, when you were really in trouble and your parents used your whole first-middle-last name to get your attention. I could easily have been named "Mary Selfish Pielenz" during those years.

While I'm not immune to bouts of selfishness as a mom, I struggle more in my relationship with Hubs. There's something to that old maternal instinct that makes it easier to set aside my wants for my kids needs. That's not as easy with the other grown-up in the house though.

I won't say I always get it right, and I'm certainly not the most self-sacrificing wife around. I try though.

A few weeks ago I shared about Mt. Hermon and some of what it meant to me this year. It was all much understated. Those five days are probably the ones I look most forward to all year. And it's not as much about 'getting away' as it is being there among like-hearted people.

Hubs is a great dad and I have no worries about him handling things with the boys while I'm away, so once I get there, it's easy to relax and make the most of the time.

This year though, Hubs was scheduled to preach that Sunday. Usually that means he spends some time Friday and Saturday preparing, but I was going to be gone and there's not much quiet time around here when you're running things solo. There's also the "Sunday Morning Factor;" that dynamic that sends things spiraling downward when you're trying to get everyone ready for a lovely, worshipful time at church.

I wanted Hubs to be able to prepare as he needed and to get to church without the usual Sunday morning stress to distract him. I had arranged for a playdate so he'd get some study time and some Sunday back-up to help with the kids, but that fell through a couple days before I left.

He would never have asked, but I offered to leave my conference to come home on Saturday evening so he could focus on preparing and getting himself to church on Sunday and I'd handle the kid stuff.

I didn't like missing a day of the conference, but in the grand scheme of things, it mattered more that I be there for Hubs than be at the conference for myself.

It's possible that things could have gone smoothly for him if I hadn't come home. And it's likely that even if they weren't smooth, the end result would have been fine. It wasn't a lack of confidence in him, but a desire to do my part to help him be at his best.

As I type this, I remember that that's even what brought us together as a couple way back when. Things aren't always easy between us (what close relationship is?), but we've always wanted the best for each other and do what we can to bring that about.

I know I don't always get it right in this area. I could speak more kindly to him much of the time, and be more patient and accepting of our differences. I do think though that one of the strengths of our relationship is that we intentionally don't tear each other down to others. (There may be another whole post in that topic.)

I have far to go to really be a Proverbs 31 woman. But I do think it is absolutely one of the most important parts of the passage.

"The wise woman builds her house, But the foolish tears it down with her own hands. Proverbs 14:1


If you blog about anything related to Proverbs 31 (gardening, home business, budgeting, frugal living...virtually any aspect of home-making) sometime during the week, you're welcome to use Mr Linky so others can see your post (please use the URL from the specific post itself, not just your blog URL).

You can also grab the Ruby Tuesdays button code and place it in your sidebar so more of your bloggy friends can come along. I look forward to seeing you on Tuesdays to discover more ways we can become the 'gems' God intends us to be.

The Stuff of Childhood

Watermelon

Wildflowers

Birthday Cake

Bubbles

Sandboxes

Somersaults

Freckles

Fun

An Epidemic of Hopelessness

Every day this week the headlines have spoken to a rampant hopelessness. I have nothing to offer in the way of analysis or understanding. I'm rather at a loss for words. (Not a good thing when you've got a blog to to fill.)

Thankfully, another Author has penned better than I could attempt:

Why are you cast down, O my soul,

and why are you in turmoil within me?

Hope in God; for I shall again praise him,

my salvation and my God.

Psalm 42:11

I wait for the LORD,

my soul waits,

and in his word I hope;

Psalm 130:5

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing,

so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope.

Romans 15:13

We have this as a sure and steadfast anchor of the soul, a hope that enters into the inner place behind the curtain, where Jesus has gone as a forerunner on our behalf.

Hebrews 6:19-20

Ruby Tuesdays--Bugged

On a recent afternoon I was at the park with Boo and some preschool playmates. The air was filled with winged-creatures, flitting, diving, racing. After we picked up Bug from school (no pun intended), I noticed that they filled the air along a main boulevard. So many swirled in the breeze they resembled fall leaves that never hit the ground.

We were all charmed and entranced by the "butterflies." Until later that afternoon, that is.

"Mom! Mom! There's a big butterfly in the back. It can't fly." The boys came in all excited about their find.

"Leave it alone. It will take off on its own."

"We tried to get it to fly, but it can't."

Remembering some vague elementary school science information about butterflies not being able to fly with wet wings or if the powdery scales on their wings are disturbed, I though I'd better go see for myself to possibly protect the delicate creature from the enthusiastic curiousity of my guys.

I was soooo not prepared for the small-bird sized MOTH on our patio rug. It totally creeped me out. I stifled the scream that wanted to escape and beat a hasty retreat back inside, with an over-the-shoulder reminder to leave it alone and it would take off. I'll spare you the details of what I'm afraid happened to the ugly thing.

The next day as I watched another flock of fluttering bugs fly out of the vineyards, I realized that all week we'd been fascinated by smaller cousins of that big moth. Remembering the dull, brown spots and markings of our icky visitor, I started to wonder why moths are creepy when we consider butterflies beautiful. After all, they start out basically the same, as varying types of caterpillars. They go through a transition that turns them into a completely new creature. But why do we value the slender-bodied, colorful winged version over the plump, plain counterpart?

Unlike their plant-pollinating counterparts, moths are pests. They can destroy entire crops by nibbling away at them. In our homes, they ruin clothes and food. And there's something about them that makes them visually repulsive.

From a distance, it's hard to tell the difference--unless you're an entymologist, or maybe a farmer. But up close, it takes barely a second look to see that a moth is really a homely imitation of an attractive species.

It got me thinking that people can be the same way. Flitting about, charmingly beguiling from a distance. But a closer look reveals characteristics that make one want to turn away. Conversely, when we encounter the truly beautiful version we're drawn in for a closer look. The kaleidescopic nature of God's best handiwork on display almost begs for more investigation.

I don't want to be a moth. I want to be sure that I am transformed into the true beauty of His creation. I hope to be the kind of woman that people are drawn to because they can't resist His handiwork, rather than the sort that looks interesting as long as I keep moving and keep people at a distance.

"Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised." Proverbs 31:30

If you'd like to join Ruby Tuesdays, add the URL to your P31-inspired post to Mr. Linky below (be sure to use the address of a specific post, not the general URL to your blog). If you grab the code for the button or link back here or mention Ruby Tuesdays in your post, it would help your readers find other posts they might enjoy too.

Bye-bye Baby!

Did you keep track of all your kids' "firsts?" First tooth, first words, first steps. I suppose I have some kind of loose record of those events someplace, but I have a whole different set of things I track.

Hubs laughs at me because I'm all about the "lasts." I've always been that way--about life in general, not just about my kids.

I know I'm not alone. Karen Kingsbury has a lovely book, Let Me Hold You Longer, that's all about the lasts that slip by when you're not looking. The last time they sit on your lap or sit still for a bedtime story, the last time you tie their shoes or drive them to school. (It'll make you cry, but it would be a really nice Mother's Day gift nonetheless).

I'm not one of those moms who rushed my guys' milestones. I didn't shave 3 months off the age they sat up/rolled over/walked/talked/memorized the pre-amble to the Constitution. (Ok, neither of them has really done that last one.)

I was perfectly content letting Bug sit in the middle of the floor for his first 8 months because he hated being on his hands and knees and never crawled at all. I didn't even do color or ABC flashcards before they started preschool. I don't hold them back, but I just kind of let things happen when they will.

Today we hit a 'last' I've been dreading. Today was Bug's last day with all his baby teeth. I know most moms get excited about planning that first tooth-fairy visit, but all I can think of is how all the photos I've taken with his beautiful, evenly-spaced pearly whites will be replaced with several years of snaggletoothed smiles.

I've known it was coming; most of his kindergarten classmates are in varying stages of jack-o-lantern grins. But I never got that week or two adjustment period where that first little tooth gets wiggly. My little guy got ahead of himself and his first adult tooth pushed through without bothering to displace the baby tooth. (Maybe I'll feel better if I call it a "secondary" tooth instead of "adult?")

So Monday we'll make an appointment with the dentist who will probably have to pull that baby tooth and it's nearest neighbor--just like another dentist did to his mom when she was about 6 too.

And while I outwardly enthuse about this great milestone (I wish I could have captured on film the way his eyes lit up when I pronounced his tooth "wiggly;") inwardly I'm going to be just a little sad that the next time I blink everything about him will be grown up.

(Is this why moms hang on to the disgusting discarded teeth?)